My depression

Date of publication:2012-2   Press: Nanhai publishing company   Author:Elizabeth Swados (American)   Pages:176  

Depression is a disease, not a disaster Cui Yongyuan editors don't know how many times urged the draft, I am embarrassed, editing is. In fact, it was written and torn. Write too true, see your scalp. Depression is very close to me, as near as a dear brother, I have most of the symptoms the book depicted, and improvisation plays the part of the. Nearly four or five years, my depression and alive. Although the national GDP up every year, but I was not happy, is full of extreme sports. The depression has much pain, do not say. My advantage is to love science, including medical science. So, I went to the hospital to see a doctor, I relate in detail to say, the doctor put drugs, I three meals a day to eat three meals. Insist on two years, the sun rises from the east. Depression is a disease, not a disaster, you see, I can show. Depression can be cured, you see, I was rated as advanced individual CCTV. Depression can be repeated, you see, I recently “ × × ” shelling;. Depression is not who wants to, not happy is not necessarily a depression, to see a joke, if also laugh no big. To guard against the current surge of depression flooding phenomenon, a lot of friends frown was sent to the hospital to be pressed the take medicine, bad music sell medicine doctor of psychology. Psychological doctors think, three courses not cure would be cool! Depression is a new thing in Chinese emerged like bamboo shoots after a spring rain, psychological doctor no, the cultivation of a depression patients in a mental doctor bridge to more difficult. The personage inside course of study in theory, the total number of qualified psychiatrist total does not exceed the Liangshan hero. I can see now, Li Gui, Zheng Tuhu, Ximen Qing, Pan Jinlian is wearing a white coat to medicine, their license is issued by the who? It is impolite of depression patients in acrimony, nor civilization, unlike the Olympic Games host country citizens. For such a person you can adopt two ways, one is to ignore, is at two. Hope because depression and get others to respect the idea is not rational, not reality. You sick. Since the depression, the criticism is not afraid of others. Depression is like an officer, as well, all of a sudden down a level, heaven knows what is good or bad. Not to say. Cui Yongyuan in 2006 December in Beijing

My depression began in a little cloud, it in my corner edge.
you're struggling with it, when necessary, to hide.
every time I got a little.
finally, you learn to love yourself.
-- remember, you come out once, then you can go out.
Author brief introduction

Elizabeth Swados (Elizabeth Swados)
USA composer, playwright, director, has won three Obie awards, five Toni prize nominations. She was beloved chosen profession be full of sound and colour, has been thirty years for severe depression.
in a recent fall into the black hole of depression, her whim, decided to borrow a pen catharsis, completed this wonderful, bitter but don't have a depression in patients with self-reported interest "". The feelings, and not to lose the sense of humor, to sketch the personalized language and highly infectious, tells the story of a depression patients with this common disease fighting experience, caused a sensation in the America after publication, known as "a people out of the depression".
Chapter excerpt

I'm composing, writing, writers, in order to actually make a living … … I have two big chocolate brown poodle … … I have respect for colleagues, faithful to friends and lovers, like talented students and actor. But now, all cancel once for all all — — when I fell into depression. My life several times into the depression and several out of (teens, twenties, thirties, and future … …) then the feeling is: two me! I don't like the black hole of depression, comfort myself, but I know, I'm a far more, many people in the bottom for help. What's in the spiraling down, feeling like the seasonal changes of … … rejection and humiliation, was severely criticized, destined to fall the world lost family and friends sometimes inexplicably not happy. So many people have depression, but everyone has their own mark! I know my depression began in a little cloud, it in my eyes, I just feel it in there. Along with the cloud is a humming and moaning all of a sudden, I can only write the sad songs. People say: “ Metz, this is a musical comedy. ” but my heart is sad. The cloud is more and more big, more and more gloomy, humming and moaning louder. Now, my music is not pleasing to the ear. I write tasteless and insipid, be a wild legend, obscure. I began to feel discouraged. I heard every carp's every word of opposition, from professional or non professional, oral or written — — not word for word and sentence for sentence, I only feel cold. I for all of the good stuff is blind. I'm very thorn, be triggered at any moment. The more people I love more provocative to their vicious. I put on my aversion to others. Sin initiation … … I avoid friends, excuse me how to succeed, how busy — — in fact, I'm afraid work. How have the door, I become old, fat, ugly! I think he is a scoundrel, the body produces sticky, scaly things, I B a horror film, 1950. When I am downTime, everything in the world in the conspiracy against me, I can't get anything. I rolled down the stairs, overdraft, dial the phone (for three times), money is leaking from the pocket. I can't find my glasses, I can't think of the name of others, I forgot about the work I began to outright lies … … how pathetic. Real life obstacle lies my stupid. I was afraid to go out, I think when people are better than me. No word for word and sentence for sentence, I only feel cold. I was in a complete mess life buried. My friends try to help me, but I don't let them get to. I always refused, also often called them. I worry that people find my depression, not me. I indulge themselves … … I feel their contempt. The smaller cloud gradually expanded. Waking up is becoming more and more difficult. I have no interest in life. I don't want to clean the room, not to waste, do not want to take a shower. I began to smoke. The thought of food will be nausea. No matter what is worth mentioning. When I fell into depression, and I live together become unbearable. Sometimes I have to open their own medicine. But there is no use, not be completely drunken, is cry … … in my mind, the court is in session. Witnesses report (can not defend). The cleaning lady, girlfriend, agent, students, aunt, cousin, father … … no, etc.! My father was not into the exemption. Now is the two star witness appearance. My mother Dutch act … … my brother Dutch act … … “ you don't want me to live! Good, have hit at the nub of &rdquo. I think we have a total of one or two families, what also can't do. Now the depressed symptoms revealed the new face, my situation sharply down, become bipolar disorder. The first is the fear, and then anger, I'm going to faint, but I sat will jump up, or to move back and forth, or kept twitching, or fall to the ground. Worse, I thought I could work in the manic and depressed state. Once, I cut a piece from each of my clothes, piece together sewn into a shirt, to an Eastern director I worship; but he and I have the same trouble, gift is his mind. I have just finished a 258 page novel, main role identity: one from Bedford hills to former criminals; a drug dog walker; a steal cleaner cleaning woman is a punk rock; one in California Suhl town of dying philanthropist; a young when he told the gospel of West Virginia wrestling championship; a Hodini era not to wear underwear channel; a HuChiHaiHe fbi. I finished in eight days, no one will ever see it. In addition to become obviously strange, I can be normally expressed a potential &mdash feel fear; &mdash! Manic makes me feel to be split. I only have one thought: I'll go crazy in public places! I'm from luxury restaurant run out, because I can't touch his forehead. I'll scream in the cinema? My friends invited me to participate in the show, and I was sneak out. Mania to rage, I lost all compassion. I even worse than before the crash. I feel utterly alone. Depression is that by surprise and full of tricks, let I be tired out. However, even in the abyss, still have the melody and amusing sound penetrate. A silly handwritten letter, it is hard to ignore. A large arm chair and a tall friend. Sooner or later, depression also stage a comeback, across the board approach. Every moment as long as eternity. Each step is like mountain climbing, climbing higher and tired. People began to judge me. Some people insist that, simply does not exist in mental or emotional illness that matter. They are super sport, or secret alcohol poisoning, or hiding in the briefcase behind the workaholic, or active “ genius ”, or TV guide readers bestsellers. This military types of people believe that personal crisis is a coward's behavior, and the politicians say this is not patriotic. Don't be silly, they or lying, or excuse, or smatter … … at the edge of the black hole, by a terror cloud chase. I finished. Left you at this place. Several times, I considered Dutch act. As I have mentioned, my mother, brothers, and some friends, choose Dutch act passed away. Dutch act is genetic? It is the contact? It so attractive? Or is this just my family the way to solve the problem? And they said, Dutch act the children more like their own disposal. I? When I think of Dutch act, I will think of those celebrities and their Dutch act the way. Virginia · her pockets with stones into the river. Kurt · Cobain collapses to fly his head. Silvia · Plath heads into the oven. Yukio Mishima Dutch Act section … … there is a long list of options on my list. Dutch Act I chose has stepped into the Sahara desert, I think this is a perfect death. I think, discount when vulture and scorpion. My lack of awareness of the situation come one after another. But these are only the black hole.The idea, from the bottom of the bottom of the bottom. I want strong, think of a way to carry the depression. Psychic, meditation, breathing and chant. Chinese herbal medicine, yoga, boxing, diet, acupuncture, regression therapy, massage, the pillow cuff and kick, biological feedback therapy, group therapy, religion. Of course, not the same, therefore, some people interested, some people are not interested in. Present my personal recommendations here: listen to a dish of Tibet Lama chanting CD; Bulgarian women's chorus of song mountain or; Lei Gui (Regge) music can purify your soul; Egypt. · 菲兹杰. De jazz concert; or with the accordion playing adagio Tango breathing. Sometimes I try to exercise. At least from one room to another. Write down the thoughts and feelings, no matter how trivial and confusion. To read some poetry (most when the melancholy). See the animal shows, cooking shows and documentary crime show spend the night. Search on the Internet at &ldquo ” depression; … … you may look more like “ for our scientists secret achievements about human trials of ”. For crying out loud. Let a small piece of chocolate to dissolve slowly in the tongue. A good night's sleep help. Imagine moved to different countries, conversion, or on the scale operation of plastic … … however, at last, you know what they say about — — no matter where you go, all the same. Upon termination, almost all of us have to receive professional help. After several years of struggle, I accept. Before I found a can trust the doctor, I had to have a good look. I saw a doctor sat in a brown chair, he had red hair, I also. It is a beginning. We discussed the serious depression is usually genetic. This is a fact as everyone knows, the mother passed on to daughter, Wu … … the doctor said, my part of the problem is the chemical nature of. He asked me if I'd like to try some new drugs. Thus began a series of drug treatment. — — you see those ads. New drugs so much, they are really useful? The drug helps a lot, but not at all time, useful for all people. Sometimes there are side effects. There is another argument: they may make you flippancy, judgment extraordinary; they may make you excited … … or &hellip … tension; or sleepiness … … or gastrointestinal discomfort. In a small group, I beat a drummer, because he is too loud. He tried to stimulate me, but … … each occasion, everyone, in “ ” fluoxetine; (PROZAC) whether during the day or night, night or day; it becomes music a song in comedy. Sometimes, there is a class of antidepressants that my sexual apathy. They taught me, put it aside. Almost spent three years of time, we finally found a feasible method. I found the clinical medical experts a great, she helped me to cope with all the. For a while, no matter how to say … … drug resistance, or a little modification (like Coffee and milk), you have to try another drug. The best medicine to also cannot stop in life contingencies. Depression may be a one-off event. It may be a long road! Decide on what path to follow … … you have to learn to struggling with it, had to hide. If you pretend to be a positive attitude, not be real. Who knows? Every time you are quite a little. Gradually, small action into a moderate degree of action. They develop into greater action. Read about the others depression. Write your feelings. Depression is a big event. What a great victory, when you get out of the hole! You may look a little different problems and before. Learn to appreciate what is in front of you. Learn a little sympathy. Learn to be tolerant of others. You become interested in getting along with people, and enjoy their company. To experience life. You also learn to love yourself. So easy now! Life is a precious gift. The smaller cloud may be. I hope the next time you will be more powerful. Remember, you went out once. — — you can go out. … …
Media attention and comments

★ Elizabeth · 斯瓦多 seize the essence that depression frenzied and imbalance, and full of smart, passionate and humorous way opened its truth! — — gene · Bresson (PhD Harvard Medical Center). This is not a book about depression depression! Her irresistible pictures and highly personalized language, tell us all about mental illness we should know, tell us how to help themselves and those around them to get rid of the dilemma. — — Gloria Steinem (· American feminist leaders). The &ldquo write bad feeling; ” book can make you feel good! & —Mdash; Jimmy · Breslin (New York columnist). Those plagued by depression, unable to describe in it is very painful! She is a strong and vigorous painting, interesting and thorough text, to convey the inner chaos of patients with depression. — — Gary · Trudeau (a famous Hollywood screenwriter)
Editor recommends

The translation of Cui Yongyuan Wang Anyi by the full recommended · full of humor; frank with you approached depression, take you out of depression
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